There is a theory which states that if anybody ever discovers exactly what the universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory that states that this has already happened.
-Douglas Adams
In our family, when someone becomes entangled in a ridiculous argument, another person chimes in with "There is a theory....". The implication is that perhaps in some other bizarre and inexplicable universe the argument would make sense. Sometimes it lightens a tense situation and gives the poor-argument-constructer a humorous way out of a situation.
Every time I hear the news lately, it seems, I just shake my head and say "There is a theory...". President Bush says -in the same speech, in the same SENTENCE: "We don't torture." and "Any activity we conduct is within the law."
Okay... what could that mean? There are only three possibilities that I see.
1) Torture is legal -except it isn't. Torture violates the Geneva Convention Relative to the Treatment of Prisoners of War, which of course we could say we're ignoring for this conflict. Except, we don't say that. Check out the Air Force's documents re: Laws of War and Laws in War. They explicitly say that the armed forces hold to the policy that the Geneva Conventions are applicable in any armed conflict.
2)If it's legal, it's, by definition, not torture. It's a subtle difference from the first possibility, but it could make a difference. If only it were legal, the argument would make sense. Alas for their side... not so much.
3) Bush is lying. It's against the law AND we do it. Sadly, this one explains the data.
There is no humor possible here. There is no light-hearted way out of this logical (and moral) jam. I'm just plain ashamed of the people inhabiting the White House and horrified at the work that's being done in my name.
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